FATHERLESSNESS THE SILENT KILLER

There is a widespread subliminal, abnormal, pathological epidemic that is causing the demise of our social fiber, weakening the integrity of our community, and slowly eating at the existence of our posterity; slowly but surely bringing us into extinction. Spreading infectious disease rapidly through our communities impairing the normal functioning, weakening our spiritual, emotional, and mental immune systems; leading to the eradication of our children and their wellbeing. These infectious diseases are not those of the physical body, but they are diseases of the mind, soul, spirit that eats at our moral fiber and weakens our ability to become empowered. I say subliminal because our youth are repeatedly fed hidden messages of self-destruction, self-indulgence, and low self-esteem, that like a cancerous tumor attaches itself to the unconscious mind. As fathers, we should educate ourselves about these social pathologies so that we are able to take preventative actions and not become just reactive. They are abnormal in that, in the past decades we’ve had a spike in the diagnoses of social, emotional, and mental disorders that has been plaguing our youth, such as ODD, ADD, ADHA, BPD, SAD, and GAD. The treatments of these disorders have been medication and psychotherapy and we find ourselves in an era where children in elementary school are taking medication for these diagnoses. While these disorders and their treatments may be legitimately valid in few cases, my personal belief is that they're not valid in most cases, and the real antidote for these disorders is the loving, consistent hands-on involvement of a D-A-D. They are pathological in that they are out of control and widespread, affecting youth of every race, ethnic group, and classes; especially in the African-American community, where there is a higher rate of incarcerated youth and fathers. Who are also on the rise for becoming the highest percentage of youth on medication and placed in facilities for these disorders. This epidemics in most instances is the work of a social-economic plot. A plot that's exacerbated even more by diminishing the role of fathers and making sure that they are less involved with their children.

The symptoms of this epidemic are clearly seen but are often misdiagnosed as being something else or just simply overlooked. This abnormal and pathological epidemic is FATHERLESSNESS. FATHERLESSNESS is not just the absence of the physical presence of a father, but it is the absence of a healthy mental, emotional, and spiritual presence that an involved, loving father can give. There are many fathers who occupy the same space and live under the same roof with their children. But most often we get caught up with running a business, jobs, religious responsibilities, social and political agendas and have very little to no quality time with our children. And we wonder why our youth are out of control. They are occupied hours upon hours in their rooms playing video games, absent of the mental, emotional, or spiritual stimulation that only a father can give. Then there are those non-residential fathers who take their children on the days or weeks that they’re supposed to have them but rely on their parents or one of their sibling to watch them, or just leave them to themselves until it's time to return them to their mother. FATHERLESSNESS often goes unnoticed and it hides under the act of being physically present. We become like mere manikins in a clothing store window; if we’re not mentally, spiritually, emotionally, socially, and educationally involved in the life of our children. Like that manikin in a store window, we look pretty good standing there, but there is no involvement, no life, no communication, and no emotional, mental, or spiritual stimulation. FATHERLESSNESS is a large and serious epidemic. Who and where are the fathers of those sons or daughters that post street fights on social media? Who and where are the fathers of those young “thugs” who hang on the corners all hours of the night, up to no good? Who and where are the fathers of those young boys who have committed mass shootings? Who or where are the fathers of those young teen female who post sexually explicit pictures of themselves on social media? Who and where are the fathers of those young teens girls who dress like ladies of the night (prostitutes)? Where are the fathers of those children who pay no attention in school or that skip school altogether? Could most of these fathers be like the father in the Biblical story called "The Prodigal Son" where the father was physically and even financially present? But was so detached from his son's mental, emotional, and spiritual needs. He was so caught up building his business that he didn't notice his son's cry for some fatherly attention. And because of this he almost lost his son to the streets and a wayward life. It is not enough to live with and be around our children, we must live within them and be in tune with them.